What our Lady Help of Christians did

FishtownStainedGlass's picture

I am ENRAGED at this school, and I want to world to know why. My daughter was enrolled with their preK program. 4000 dollars for her to go there, which we paid in monthly insltallments of 350 a month.
Well, her school trip comes around, a picnic in center city to watch a play of some bunnies Max and Ruby. I get a notice a week ahead of time "Balance of X amt. needs to be paid for Fund Raising or Jade cant go on the trip" So I pay that.
I get another notice home "Balance of X amt must be paid for Late Fees or Jade cant go on the trip." So I pay that.
I pay for the trip, we mark it on the calander and the day before it happens I get another notice "Pack a lunch the trip is tomorrow!" So I do that.
The day of the trip my little girl LAUNCHES herself out of bed and is ready before I am even up. I get her lunch packed and her father drops her off at school.
We go to pick her up at 245... and shes in tears, withdrawn, 4 ft away from all the other kids and wont talk.
They didnt take her on the trip. They took EVERY KID but her. They made her sit in a cafeteria all day. Why? Because for the past 2 payments of tuition I made 200 dollar payments instead of 350 on her tuition because money was a bit tight. But did I hear anything about my tuition before the trip? NO! Any call to let me know it would stop Jade from going? NO! They just punished her, and she doesnt understand why all of her friends went without her.
Gotta love the Catholic spirit OOOZing from that slimey school. In my opinion the neighborhood is LUCKY to be rid of them. How dare they punish my child, who does not understand. All they had to do was TALK to me and I would have fixed the problem, but instead they were sneaky and underhanded and GREEDY.
I gave Jade an early summer, and she is home with me now. I enrolled her in a 4000 Pre K to teach her valuable lessons and give her a leg up. What she learned was not to trust promises. Thanks a lot Our Lady Punished Innocent Children.

lauraska's picture

Wow, that is an awful story.

Wow, that is an awful story. I've heard other stories about people who sent their children to non-denominational pre-K programs and their children were punished over issues between the parents and the school, so you are not alone, and I actually don't think it's specific to the Catholic school system. (Yes, I know...wow...Laura is letting the Catholic church off the hook. Let's not all go crazy, now.)

This is a horrible way to deal with children. And you would think, since they ARE supposed to be teaching good Christian values, that it wouldn't have gone down like that.

I'm sure your little one is happy to be home with you, though. :)

PattiMey's picture

This is why the Parish

This is why the Parish Schools are quickly becoming a thing of the past. I remember a time when I went to pick up my nephew from Holy Name. He came out of school very upset and with a note pinned to his coat. He told me that he and a few other children had to sit all afternoon in the class with coats on and notes pinned to coat. This was because tuition was not paid. He was 6 yrs.old.

nhb's picture

PattiMey wrote:This is why

PattiMey wrote:

This is why the Parish Schools are quickly becoming a thing of the past. I remember a time when I went to pick up my nephew from Holy Name. He came out of school very upset and with a note pinned to his coat. He told me that he and a few other children had to sit all afternoon in the class with coats on and notes pinned to coat. This was because tuition was not paid. He was 6 yrs.old.

That happened to friend of mine also, i think her children attend Holy Name also.

PeeWeeMartini's picture

Wow. That's just terrible.

Wow. That's just terrible. Are they refunding you the money you paid for the trip?

ofofhy's picture

That's not the worst that

That's not the worst that the diocese has done: http://www.philly.com/philly/hp/news_update/16248017.html

While I understand the need to have tuition paid, I don't like punishing the kids for it.

dan's picture

I sure understand your anger

I sure understand your anger and frustration!

That said, I come at this from a little different perspective:

#1) I just can't buy the characterization of parochial schools are greedy. Although people pay tuition, that tuition does not come near to covering the cost of the child's education. That school is subsidizing each child's education. That's not greedy.

#1) After years of sitting on the other side, I've learned how people screw churches out of thousands of dollars over and over and expect the churches to accept it because that's supposed to be the "good Christian" thing to do.

One example: Taking child on a retreat that costs the church $100/child. We only ask kids to pay $30, and we pay the other $70. Parent pleads that money is too tight and can't pay for kids. We agree to take the child without paying anything. Less than one week later parent is driving a newly purchased SUV.

Another example: We take children on trip that costs $40/child. One parent promises to pay next week after payday. When parent is asked to pay next week, parent starts screaming, "I knew when my kid got involved in that church that all you'd be doing is trying to take money from us." Parent is seen less than one hour later carrying two cases of beer out of beverage distributor, and a few days later buying weed on the street corner. Parent never does keep promise to pay.

Please note that I am not saying you're that kind of parent. What I'm saying is that kind of parent is the reason the kind of thing that happened to you happens.

dan's picture

ofofhy wrote:That's not the

ofofhy wrote:

That's not the worst that the diocese has done: http://www.philly.com/philly/hp/news_update/16248017.html

While I understand the need to have tuition paid, I don't like punishing the kids for it.

That's a really painful story, and I would probably do it differently.

That said, I really empathize with this part of the article:

Quote:

"...are you writing stories about the $8 million we provide in tuition assistance?".

ofofhy's picture

dan wrote:That said, I

dan wrote:

That said, I really empathize with this part of the article:

Quote:

"...are you writing stories about the $8 million we provide in tuition assistance?".

Absolutely, but the parents signed on to pay the tuition. There are avenues to pursue them for the money. There is no way they should be holding the child's education hostage in this case.

FSG, Sorry your daughter couldn't go see Max and Ruby, but our bunnies Ralf, Hope (yes, my wife knits hats for rabbits), and George say hello to her.

lauraska's picture

Dan, I don't think the

Dan, I don't think the original poster is questioning the fact that she needs to pay tuition in order for her child to stay in school. The point she was making was that they notified her of the need to pay other fees and she did so, but they did not notify her that failure to pay the tuition that she owed would mean that her child would sit alone in a room for an entire day while the other students went on their trip. Her anger appears to be over the fact that the school took the situation out on the child, instead of addressing the parent directly.

That, in my opinion, is inexecusable. I'd be willing to bet that it was pretty traumatic for a child that age. A financial dispute does not warrant emotional torture of a child.

PeeWeeMartini's picture

ofofhy

ofofhy wrote:

hahahahahahahahahaha

dan's picture

lauraska wrote:Dan, I don't

lauraska wrote:

Dan, I don't think the original poster is questioning the fact that she needs to pay tuition in order for her child to stay in school. The point she was making was that they notified her of the need to pay other fees and she did so, but they did not notify her that failure to pay the tuition that she owed would mean that her child would sit alone in a room for an entire day while the other students went on their trip. Her anger appears to be over the fact that the school took the situation out on the child, instead of addressing the parent directly.

I understand that, and hope that my post made it clear that I understood it. I wasn't saying that I necessarily agree with what was done, but I sure as heck understand it.

I was also trying to make it clear that the parent often doesn't give a rat's patootie until the child is denied participation in an event. (And, I did also say clearly, I didn't think the original poster is that kind of parent.)

PattiMey's picture

lauraska wrote: That, in my

lauraska wrote:

That, in my opinion, is inexecusable. I'd be willing to bet that it was pretty traumatic for a child that age. A financial dispute does not warrant emotional torture of a child.

This is so true, lauraska.
And for the record, my sister-in-law was putting 3 children throught catholic high at the time and fell $60 behind on my nephew's tution. Without assistance from the church.
I don't think this is how Jesus was teaching.

Pure_Fishtown's picture

Patti: It is unexcusable

Patti:

It is unexcusable the way some of the Catholic schools treat their studies/families.

My dad passed away in 1971 without a pension or large insurance policy; at that time most people just carried enough to bury themselves.

When my brother was old enough for high school, tuition was going to be a problem. Oh, they told us about this wonderful program for those in need. Yeah, they didn't tell you all the stigmas that would affect a kid. NO prom, NO yearbooks, NO extracurricular activities, NO classring, and the topper YOU CANNOT walk down the aisle.

Yeah, real Christian like. Needless to say, it left a very bad taste in our mouths. And, in fact, they still practice that today.

Nunzio's picture

This is a horrible

This is a horrible situation. I truly believe the schools and the Archdiocese could find a better way to collect tuition than their practice, which is to single out and punish children.

An interesting side note to the story about the young woman kicked out of Little Flower is that Vince Fumo quietly paid the delinquent tuition out of his own pocket.

girlscoutmommy's picture

Thats horrible. Before

Thats horrible. Before going to Adaire my girls attended holy name. Their tuition was always up to date. After giving birth to my 3rd child with alot of complications we missed mass and didnt hand in our envelopes for a few weeks. When their trip came up they couldnt go unless I paid all that up to date. They also had a note pinned to their jackets which they got infront of the whole class. Just a horrible thing to try to explain to little ones.

Ftown66's picture

Hey this is one of the rare

Hey this is one of the rare times i agree with Dan 100%.

Kat's picture

AUGH! I would be livid too.

AUGH! I would be livid too. I'm sorry for your little daughter that that happened. I certainly think the way they handled that was ridiculous.

Maggie's picture

Just a little plug for a

Just a little plug for a different kind of private school: Frankford Friends. Their entire philosophy would make the above situation impossible. No child would ever be treated that way: financial transactions are between the parents and the school ONLY. ALWAYS. They DO cost a bit more than Catholic schools, but MUCH MUCH MUCH less than the other Friends Schools.

george's picture

ofofhy wrote:Sorry your

ofofhy wrote:

Sorry your daughter couldn't go see Max and Ruby, but our bunnies Ralf, Hope (yes, my wife knits hats for rabbits), and George say hello to her.

"Hello to her."

ofofhy's picture

PeeWeeMartini

PeeWeeMartini wrote:

hahahahahahahahahaha


This one was a bit more rabbitty.

rtsaidred's picture

Oh, I'm so sorry for your

Oh, I'm so sorry for your situation. It makes my heart hurt. How is your daughter now??

FISHTOWNMOMMY's picture

you will never get the money

you will never get the money back they need to pay for the layers for the ones who molested are kids!!!!

george's picture

FISHTOWNMOMMY wrote:you will

FISHTOWNMOMMY wrote:

you will never get the money back they need to pay for the layers for the ones who molested are kids!!!!

Ick.

Maybe we need to make public schools a priority in this country again? Even if it involves the dreaded "T" word that (God forbid) might actually increase the tax burden on the comfortable so that we might have an educational system that reflects a first-world society and gives American kids a fighting chance to compete globally in technology and the sciences (as well as being able to string a sentence together and find Canada on a map)?

I know...crazy talk.

Kat's picture

FISHTOWNMOMMY wrote:you will

FISHTOWNMOMMY wrote:

you will never get the money back they need to pay for the layers for the ones who molested are kids!!!!

Were you referring to a specific instance or are you saying that every priest in the Catholic religion molests kids? I hope it is not the latter because I take GREAT offense to that. It breaks my heart being Catholic and finding that the church covered so much of this up. It sickens me. But do not assume that every priest is a pedophile because that is simply untrue.

AM's picture

I have to agree with Dan -

I have to agree with Dan - although I would never imply that the poster is the type of parent who doesn't prioritize tuition or take care of their child's needs first - there are many folks who are complaining about paying tuition but are out every weekend, take elaborate vacations, drive beautiful cars, etc. and then complain about paying $4,000 a year for tuition. Its just sad that those people who do prioritize correctly but run into hard times, pay for the bad behavior of others. I have 4 in catholic school - it's worth every dime! - I understand the struggles involved. I can't wait for my oldest to graduate this year. I may finally be able to get a car. My heart breaks for your daughter.

dan's picture

Kat wrote: But do not assume

Kat wrote:

But do not assume that every priest is a pedophile because that is simply untrue.

As I understand it, statistics show that pedophilia is not any more common among priests than it is among the general population, and that it may actually be less common among priests than it is among married men.

As your post more-or-less says, the really bad thing is the way that it was often (not) dealt with when it became known.

dan's picture

AM wrote:Its just sad that

AM wrote:

Its just sad that those people who do prioritize correctly but run into hard times, pay for the bad behavior of others.

That's precisely the point I was making.

AM wrote:

My heart breaks for your daughter.

Who is, of course, most important in all of this.

PattiMey's picture

This thread was about the

This thread was about the humilation of children. It's cruel and should not be allowed under any circumstances. The contract to pay tuition is between the parents and the school. Not the child. Deal with the parents. Call, write letters but send by mail. If that don't work then tell the parents it's time to find another school. I am proud to say I am catholic but I am not always proud of the people who run this organization.

brooke's picture

Wow, this is a sad story.

Wow, this is a sad story. There's got to be a better way for these schools to collect money. I also understand what Dan is saying...I just can't believe there isn't a better way to collect the money!

ruthereyet's picture

thats our lady for help for

thats our lady for help for you. The people who deal with the money there should all be replaced. I had three boy in that school about 5years back. They announced over the loud speaker that my tuition was late. my older son who was in 8 grade at time was so upset. When i went up the next day they tried to say it was a mistake. the only mistake was sending my children there in the first place. I say good rinse to this school.P.S I took my kids out of the school that same day.